April Fools

1 Apr 2014 by gebhard, 2 Comments »

1458681_720704347950205_729660442_nToday, April 1st, is Baroness Katayoun and my anniversary. I met her at my 2nd event, the one at which I authorized. My Barony of Middle Marches, led by then Baron Ragnar, faced off against the now vigilant Baron Nico and Flaming Gryphon.

If you would, let me start at the beginning.  It will be a good story.

Baron Wars was my first camping event. I read a lot of websites about what I would need. Things like a tent, cot, sleeping bag and garb. None of which I owned.

I spent the week making my first T-tunic. Out of 100% linen. I paid 18 dollars a yard at JoAnn’s. It was made by hand, I didn’t own a sewing machine.

I got off work an hour early on Friday so I would have time to stop by Target to buy the first tent I would ever own, and the first I would set up in about 15 years.

My two boys were with me, as the SCA was something I thought we could do together as a family.  They had never been camping, and I had always liked it.

We headed out for a 3 hour drive.  Back then, I considered anything longer than 40 minutes a “damn long” time to be in a car.

I used instructions from this new web service called Google Maps. The instructions where nothing but roads called things like 2341, 10234 and 15982. I use term “roads” in the loosest sense.  They where mostly dirt paths between farms. Every 15 miles, I had to stop at whatever small store or church to ask for instructions to the next state route. The three hour drive on the “quickest route possible” took 6 hours. (On the return trip, I only needed to make 3 turns to get from site to my house on the highway system in 2.5 hours).

As a result, I showed up to site completely after dark, I pulled my tent out of a box and started trying to figure out how those darn poles fit together. Some friends from the local group helped me out, and provided a flashlight, which for some reason wasn’t on my list of things to bring.

63910_160381950788129_2005276484_nWhen I exited my tent in the morning, that was the first time I saw Katayoun.  She was making coffee on a camp stove across the field where our tents were set up in. She looked very sad to me. I was very happy to be camping for the first time in forever and to be experiencing this amazing place with all these crazy awesome things like armor and bacon and whatever that was in that flask.  The day just kept getting better. I was going to authorize!  Katayoun looked like she could use a little happiness, and I had lots to share. I was going to see if I could get her to smile.

After my authorization, I joined our Baronial army on the field, and Katayoun was in front of me in the shield wall. I taped her on the shoulder and smiled and waved. She gave me a nervous smile back and moved a few position down.

Through the melees, I would see her again and again. I would always wave and smile, and always I would get that “why are you so strange” smile and wave back.

After the melees, the rains started and it got very cold. I attended court (as told in a previous article).  By the time it was over, my lips were turning blue from cold and all I had was my tunic and sweat pants. I wandered into a vendor who had cloaks. The ones in the back said “100% wool, extra warm” so I put one on and handed the lady running the shop my credit card. I did not care what I cost, only that I did not have to take it off to buy it.  Later, I learned it was not cheap. The receipt was stuck to my backside, and people would be in shock of what I just spent on a cloak.  However, I consider to be the best purchase I ever made.

I wandered back to my camp to join my friends in excess drinking, something I had never done much of before. I really never drank before the SCA.

Sometime that evening, a very cold Katayoun happened by me. I don’t know if it was the moonshine cherries or the fact that it was 30 degrees in a misty rain and I had a warm cloak big enough for three people to fit into, but she decided to join me. (Protip: if you’re a single guy, get a large cloak)

We spend the night cuddled up in a chair talking about life, children, philosophy…whatever else came to mind.  Sometime near dawn, we went our separate ways to sleep.

8540_160439860782338_1974704754_nI awoke a few hours later to the sound of my two boys and her son playing together. They had invented boffer baseball. One would throw a boffer sword and the other would hit it with another boffer sword, and try to run to a base on top of a small hill. This was great fun to everyone not trying to sleep.

We talked often after our return home and one thing led to another, which I’ll save for another time.

The things I like most about my beloved Baroness are that she is an intelligent, strong, independent woman. We can talk for hours about anything and everything from period farming to quantum mechanics or micro-robotics.

As I tell my boys, you can marry a woman for only how she looks, but what will you do with the other 23 and half hours of your day? (Let’s face it, I’m being pretty generous giving you 30 minutes.)

A spouse you can share your passions with, your thoughts, with whom you can make new discoveries, who will rejoice when you find a solar robot in the used toy bin, will debate comics or classic literature or poetry, who understands why you just spent 2k on armor and will spend the same amount on period jewelry or fabric, can hit you over the head with a sword, who will attend an opera or a Jonathan Coulton concert with you, and even want a t-shirt from the show.  Such a person is a rare find.  This is the friend I have found in my lovely Baroness Katayoun.

Happy Anniversary!


Note: Katayoun and I did really get married on April 1st, in a park by a priest who’s legal last name was “Jester”

Top most picture taken by our good friend: Rannvæig Ørraärmr Eskilskona

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  1. Sæhildr says:

    Awww! Sweet story!

  2. Flora says:

    You were right, that is a good story!

Leave a Reply to Flora

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